Cooties

"Oh look, carnage!"

Clint Hadson (Wood) is trying to write a horror novel, but needs to be a substitute teacher to make ends meet.  He subs at his old school, Fort Chicken Elementary School and runs into his old crush, Lucy McCormick (Pill), who teaches at the school.  At lunch, a student named Shelly (Sunny May Allison), eats a tainted chicken nugget and starts exhibiting strange behavior.  During Clint's class, she bites another student and then runs away.  Soon most of the students have been scratched and attack and kill their teachers.

Clint and Lucy and a few other teachers are in the teacher's lounge and avoid the attack.  Clint and Lucy are joined by Lucy's boyfriend Wade (Wilson) who teaches gym, violent teacher Rebekkah (Pedrad), scared teacher Tracy (McBrayer), socially awkward teacher Doug (Whannell), and stoned crossing guard Rick (Garcia).  Can they fight off their students long enough to get help?


The posters for this film looked intriguing enough for me to check it out on Netflix.  The synopsis sounded good too, so I gave it a try.

The first thing you need to know about this film is that it's written by Leigh Whannell (one of the writers of the Saw movie franchise) and Ian Brennan (one of the writers / creators of TV show Glee).... and that is a good description of what you're getting.  It is a horror movie that doesn't shy away from gore and creepy characters, but is also funny and a little off-beat.  Whannell contributed his love of horror, while Brennan replaced the straight up scares with absurd pay-offs... and somehow it works.  The film also has 2 directors: Jonathan Milott and Cary Murnion.  Milott and Murnion have worked together since film school, but this is their first time directing a feature film.

The film was initially premiered at Sundance Film Festival in 2014, but didn't officially release until 2015.  The main change from the Sundance premiere and the film as it is now, is the ending.  The original ending is preserved on the DVD, but was replaced with a more satisfying ending.

The cast is comprised of well-known faces in comedy.  Elijah Wood is best known for his role in The Lord of the Rings trilogy, but has had a long career in both TV and movies in a variety of genres.  Rainn Wilson starred in the TV show The Office (the US version), Alison Pill has done a little bit of everything including TV (The Newsroom) and comedy (Scott Pilgrim vs. the World), Jack McBrayer was on TVs 30 Rock, Jorge Garcia was on TVs Lost, and Nasim Pedrad was a regular on Saturday Night Live.  And both of the writers have roles in the film, Whannell is Doug and Brennan is Vice Principal Simms.

The premise is interesting and the cast is good... I didn't love the gore, but otherwise it is a decent film.  Not as funny as I expected, but not scary (just gross).  Don't watch while eating...

Cooties (2014) 88 minutes
Rating: R for horror violence and gore, language including sexual references, and some drug use
Director: Jonathan Milott & Cary Murnion
Starring: Elijah Wood as Clint Hadson
Alison Pill as Lucy McCormick
Rainn Wilson as Wade Johnson
Jack McBrayer as Tracy Lacey
Jorge Garcia as Rick
Nasim Pedrad as Rebekkah Halverson
Leigh Whannell as Doug
Peter Kwong as Mr. Hatachi